"You know you're on my mind."

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The first snowflake fell upon Elysia’s scalp during her time on the edge of the dock. She seemed to be dozing off in her arctic form, curled up. The scenery was simply too nice to not enjoy a nap in. Her furry coat, almost dark blue, shook slightly from the sensation of the snow sticking on her. It’s been cold lately, but the shifter chopped it up as unpredictable weather in an unexpected place.

The fox lifted her head. Her eyes brighter in this form, sparkling within the heavy snowfall. She stood on all four paws, her tail wagging from the pure thrill she was experiencing. It snowed in the Sanctuary. And although she fled from home, she couldn’t help but to feel pure warmth within her soul. It was coursing through her veins and wouldn’t leave like a friendly parasite. The snow only piled on the wood, thickening in width and coating the land before her. Her eyes flickered above to the grass around the water. It seemed it was coming in fast.

Elysia ran for the hills– literally. She jumped to impressive heights to hop over the barrels and obstacles that came her way. Nothing was going to stop the fox. Her chattering and laughing were loud for everyone to hear. Only that everyone seemed to be inside. The sun was setting at this time and it must’ve hit below zero for snow to stick so quickly. Nonetheless, Elysia sang the song of her kind: her way of showing her playfulness.

Once she reached the snow, the white snowball dove into the snow. A pure instinct of hunting, but the human peeked through. It was simply entertaining to be in the air for an extended amount of time. As if she was in flight. Free as a bird, what she had always yearned for. It had only been a week and she isn’t too sure what to do with the newfound time she has on her hands. Hunting can’t last forever, and she doesn’t need too much sleep. So oftentimes, she comes by the dock to watch the stars. And she can’t help but think they are more free than her. Unshackled by society and open to be who they are meant to be. Bright and hopeful. Where everyone takes notice in awe.

This moment was hers. All of hers. The only thing she owned. Her coat easily blended in with the covering of the lands. Like her own personal warm blanket. White canines were shown throughout her echoes of joy. It was all for Elysia, that’s what she convinced herself of anyway. However, something felt missing. My, what was she missing? It was far colder all of the sudden. It must’ve marked a new season.

It hit her. The shock became so prevalent she shifted back into her human form. Her eyes widened as she was sprawled out along the white blanket. Another memory had hit her from a month prior, she was still back home. A headache came about as she had the revelation. 

°.•☆•.°

A knock on her door came about. Elysia was sitting on her bed, reading silently to herself. She had been secretly preparing for her adventure without telling her parents her plan. Without another word, she shut the fairytale book and placed it under her pillow. The shifter leaned back on the bedding. By this time, she had easily read it well over a thousand times. Her imagination expanding with each read. 

“Come in.” The daughter spoke out. 

As the door opened, it appeared to be an elder-version of Elysia from first glance. Her roots were much darker and the white tinted into gray. However, when it came to her upturned nose, bright blue and big eyes, and rosy cheeks, it all spoke Elysia. In the flesh, though, it was her mother: Lystra Vanora. She seemed to have a similar fur coat to the one her daughter has in her closet. Though a clan symbol on the back. Lystra had a kind smile upon her lips. The same as the younger shifters. Though her smile lines shone through. 

Lystra spoke aloud, though her voice was not very loud. It was a hair above a whisper. “Hey there, honey. Are you excited? We can count down to your birthday now.”

Her eyes shifted to her mother’s. She almost forgot her birthday. There was so much to say, so much she was feeling, but she wondered how fast her mother would tune it out. So she responded, “Yes, of course I am.”

“Twenty-one.”

“Yes, mom, I can keep up with my age.”

Her mother gave another warm smile. She silently exited the young woman’s door. A breath of relief as Elysia looked out the window to peer at the endless snow. It was a fact they were all alone. Every year, it was the same. A small cake with one candle. With the same people. With the same song. It was predictable, so what joy would Elysia find in that? It ate away at her. The Vanora girl knew there was something bigger waiting on her. And it couldn’t wait.

°.•☆•.°

“Are you guys wishing me… a happy birthday right now?” Her tone was solemn. 

The woman's eyes closed for the remainder. Her first birthday without her family– and all alone, nonetheless. She wasn’t going to speak of this. Her birthday. She just came around, so who would care anyway. It was a price she had to pay for freedom. Being lonely on the street was better than being lonely in a place that was supposedly her home. Elysia couldn’t get the thought out of her head. 

Without a doubt, they were home with the small cake and candle. Guilt wasn’t something she was expecting to experience. To her, it was worth it. Worth all of it. The seven days of travel, nowhere to sleep, hunting alone. She got what she needed. What she desperately wanted. However, the thought of her family mourning, perhaps thinking she had passed away, was laying heavy on her. Someone so small, fragile had to deal with a heavy burden that was her emotions. It seemed unjust.

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"And one day I am gonna grow wings"

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The warmer climate was something Elysia would have to get used to. However, the cave brought the wind inside. The pressure of said winds must’ve made it ten to fifteen degrees colder. It was enough for the shifter to reasonably fall asleep. The full moon shone through the shrub and moss to cast lighting and shadows thereafter. An owl nearby cooing to alert others of their territory. All in all, it was something so delicate. Serene. Something she hadn’t received in the five days she’s been moving without a full stop.

The young woman couldn’t get her mind off of freedom, the sweet smell of it. It was personified, as if when she reached the gates, they would enrapture her in its arms. When she has her mind on a goal, there’s no stopping it. Obstacles cannot be too big or turbulent for her to reconsider– not even for a second. It was one of the admirable traits she has yet to realize, only a quirk that she notes. Elysia was never the self-awareness type. No one around her was. It’s strange, how they all minded their business. They tended to themselves when it came to personal business and only that. Back home, yes, they considered themselves a clan, but it wasn’t family. Elysia could hardly get a word in without being interrupted. Something Elysia also heard in fairytales. A place to belong, people to smile at.

Tossing and turning. Over and over. A pair of blue eyes would flutter now and then, trying to shake off the nightmare repeatedly. A nightmare, as she calls it. Though it is only memories of the past. Only a few weeks prior.

°.•☆•.°

“Did you see what we just caught?!” The young boy, also with stark white hair, exclaimed. He held a lemming in his palms. The rodents were small, but Arctic foxes were small, too. They didn’t need much to get through a week.

“‘Atta son! See? It wasn’t too bad.” His father exclaimed. The young man had a group with him, who all held their fair share of what they’d eat that night for dinner. 

The Vanora clan was small, just those who were part of the family. Two parents with their three children. Two cousins with their parents. Tight-knit, but oddly distant with one another. They seemed happy– for now. Though the small woman, sitting inside and watching out the window, wondered how long it’d last until they went silent again. She kept her knees close to her with a warm embrace. Contemplative and waiting. Waiting. Again, day after day.

Deciding to use their human forms, they sat at the small dinner table really meant to fit four, but the family of nine made it work. They were foxes, not handy enough to build a larger one. It was pure silence, only clinking of knives and forks. The Vanora woman couldn’t handle it. It was never loud enough. No laughs or exchange of words. This time Elysia had something nestled deep in her head. It couldn’t get out, no matter how much alone time she had to let it pass. Thinking back, it may have been the final stone to set her goal in place. 

Elysia sat her fork down, not able to keep it inside, “I-I’m, uh,” Her eyes fell on the cloth that lined the table. “I’m thinking of exploring. Beyond the tundra.” She quickly, almost frantically, added, “I’ll come back– of course.”

A bang on the table thereafter happened, ringing around the home. It came from the fist of none other than The Head of the Clan, Tirian Vanore. His neutral expression turned into a scowl. He spoke out quickly, “Elysia Alaida Vanore!”

Said woman shifted her ears back, fearful of the reaction from her angry father. “It’d only be for a few months! I just want to–”

He wasn’t having it. He shook his head, standing up, “This family has done more than enough sacrifices for the only daughter to wish to leave. No, you are not permitted.”

“But father, I–”

“The answer is no, Elysia.”

After a few moments of her father catching his breath, he sat back down. However, something bubbled inside of Elysia. For the first time, Elysia felt hatred. Full of it, actually, it was overflowing her cup. Her pupils dilated as she peered through her father. As if she weren’t there. Only being a bystander to her own actions. A bystander to her life. She couldn’t do it for any longer.

That’s when Elysia stood up. “What is everyone protecting me from?!”

Her mother interjected, “Honey, please–”

“No, mom!” She shook her head, stomping her foot on the ground. “I am an adult! I hunt for my own food, I provide for the clan just as everyone else does!” Elysia’s breath quickened, a thousand thoughts passing by. She started, and now she cannot stop. “I cannot be held back like this. The fairytales must be true!-- And they are true. I can feel it.”

Thereafter, Elysia turned on her heel to storm away to her room. Only stopping when Tirian spoke up. His voice colder, more stern: “The world beyond isn’t for you. Stay here with your people. Your place is with us, where you belong.”

Only for a moment did she pause for this. She only continued off. 

°.•☆•.°

Ellie woke up for the final time. The sun was peeking through and it was getting warmer by the hour. Her hair, a disheveled mess, almost stood straight up. Nonetheless, Elysia gave a small yawn. A smile graced her lips. The dream had shaken her up, of course, but this was the only way she could move on. Her journey only had a few days more until she reached her sanctuary. Stories to be told and people to be met were waiting on her. She wasn’t going to back down. Even from the obstacle that was her psyche.

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Elysia’s hot breath filled the cold as she walked through the thick and heavy snow. It was much harder to traverse on foot instead of paws, but this was something she felt necessary. Being in her “human” form was slightly tiring, considering she spent most of her time as a fox. She didn’t need to be human in the Tundra. She couldn't hunt or move as fast, almost like the human part was a setback to her true, agile abilities.

This time, though, she stayed with the struggle. The pure inconvenience to prove to herself she’s ready to leave home. The tundra, and her small clan, was all she ever knew. Only stories of a civilization out there living in walls. It wouldn’t seem pleasing to most– her family often spoke of the fights, dirtiness, and unpleasantness the Sanctuary had. It was no place for a “girl like her.” Elysia would be safer within her clan until the day she died, but that was the problem.

Until the day she died..? Staying in the same place. With the same people. Nothing new coming about, just the same, old routine. Wake up, hunt, rest. Wake up, hunt, rest. It was madness. Although she preferred staying as a fox, her other instincts were strong. Telling her the whole new world she has yet to discover. It’s the simple fact that she knew how tough this journey would be by herself, on foot. However, her desires triumph. To make herself known to the world. Living in a metaphorical, cold bubble wasn’t her destiny.

Ever since the shifter was a little girl, her caretakers would often give her bedtime stories. Tales of the Knight saving the Princess and restoring peace back into their realm. Elysia had no interest in being the Princess. To wait to be saved, no. That was far too weak for someone like her. A young woman full of ambition. She had to be the knight: strong, dutiful, and courageous. It was all Elysia dreamed about. Saving others, putting herself to use for a bigger cause.

And so she walked. Her fur coat was so thick the wintery winds couldn’t penetrate. However, her nose was as red as a rose. Her breath was a thick fog into the coming night, that only blew back on her face. She needed to set up somewhere. The traveling bag, almost as heavy as her, was seriously weighing her down. The dreamer staggered every now and then– tripping on herself, having to pick something back up that fell out of her bag, or take a few moments of break. One thing kept her going: the thought of seeing the open gates to civilization.

The gates that represent a new freedom and ideas. It wasn’t something Elysia was going to give up on. She sped up her sluggish pace, leaning forward, and running. She ran like her life depended on it. The shifter could go a few more days without food, and even in her human form, she could run nearly as fast in her other body. As the winds nearly broke the surface of her skin, she could only hear one thing in the back of her head,

“If you set foot out of your home, do not come back.”

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Hello, I am Bug. I like to write lore content for Elysia. This is one of my small pieces as I'm continuously fleshing her out. But this is certainly my shortest one. If this is the wrong section, sorry, I'll move it!